Back in July, spurred on by our own scheming mastermind Ben, a few of us TV Spy Lost dafties jumped at the chance to undergo The Dharma Initiative’s eligibility test, a seemingly inane cognitive skills test measuring whether you’ve got what it takes to join the company’s Department of Heuristics and Research on Material Applications.
Following the initial assessment, there was a video to all recruits, complete with conspiratorial distortions…
Since then, I’ve had to undergo two more tests. I haven’t felt so much pressure since my 11+ exam!
Test 1: Pressurized Spatial Judgement Evaluation… Sounds serious, but I like jigsaws, so that one was fine.
Test 2: Broad Spectrum Knowledge Analysis… Sounds like general knowledge. I’m no trivia queen, but I thought I was doing OK – until, that is, I came to this question…
Test 3: Dexterity and Attentiveness Evaluation… I should have had more coffee before attempting this.
Test 4: Tangential Judgment Analysis… Lost seems pretty good at going off on tangents to me…
What do they mean? How am I doing? Will I pass?
My progress looks like this so far, but those sneaky Dharma bods use suitably incomprehensible labels, so Richard Alpert could be coming round to ask me about knives, or I could be on the shortlist for people forced to push the donkey wheel.
Have you done your tests, too? And if so, how have you fared so far?Check out DharmaWantsYou right now if you haven’t joined in the ‘fun’ yet. There’s still plenty of time to sign up!
Namaste!
